On my YouTube channel, I would often refer to my audience as Aspies. “Aspie” is a term of endearment to call people diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome. I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome at two years old.

The first time I heard the word “Aspie” was from a YouTuber named Phantom Strider. I heard it in his video “Top 10 Best Nickelodeon Shows.” He uses the word “Aspie” at #4 of the list. Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuZsvmVQrYg

I LOVE cartoons. I kinda binged watched Phantom Striders’s videos for a few weeks, which are all pretty much cartoon related. This is one of the first videos I watched of his. If you love cartoons like me, I recommend his channel. He loves animation, passionate, and knowledgable about the industry. He has Asperger Syndrome too and I even talk about him in one of my YouTube videos. One thing I want to note before I go any further is that: in the context Josh uses the word “Aspie,” it’s very affectionate and positive. He does not use it in a negative way.

Link to Phantom Strider’s Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCp5p6e83X5blZ93BaW_dvpg

I’ve been active on the channel for over a year. It’s been 8 months since my last video, so it’s not really active anymore. Throughout my time actively making YouTube videos, I’ve been referring to my audience members as “Aspies.” However, a lot of people who watched my videos didn’t grow up with the “Asperger” diagnosis. They grew up with “Autism.” Or often times “High Functioning Autism.”

I have a friend I regularly talk to named Charlie. He grew up on “Autistic”, not “Aspie.” Check him out on Instagram here: Charlie Martinez (@oldmancharles_34). He and I have had conversations on how we grew up with a different label, even though Aspergers is just a high functioning form of Autism. He’s told me that he doesn’t always like the term “Aspie” because it makes him feel excluded. As if having “Autism” is inferior to having “Aspergers.” If you have “autism,” you’re “slower,” “more socially awkward,” or just “less functional” than someone with Aspergers, even though they are both autism. If you have “Asperger Syndrome,” you’re still slow and socially awkward, but at least you don’t “have it as bad” as the autistic guy (or gal). This to me feels wrong. My friend Charlie is a great guy! He and I are into a lot of the same stuff and I enjoy my conversations with him. A big part of it is our ASD common ground and our love for movies. I haven’t met him in person, but I find it hard to believe that people judge him more harshly than they would me just because I didn’t grow up on “autistic.”

I know someone that grew up on “Aspie” who thought Aspergers and Autism were their own separate thing (medical websites will tell you otherwise). This used to be the case until 2013, which was obviously only 6 years ago. When the person told me he had Aspergers, I said, “I have Aspergers, too.” He reacts with, “I thought you had Autism!” That immediately made me think, ‘You think I’m dumber than someone with Aspergers?’ I am not AT ALL saying that I think autistic people are dumber than people with Aspergers, but that’s the stigma. Now, this was a long time ago and this man has changed a lot. I really like him as a person and I enjoy his presence. However, he was different back then and what he said hurt me.

These are some reasons that made me consider going by “autistic person” instead of “Aspie.” On Twitter, I often refer to myself as Autistic. In fact, #ActuallyAutistic is probably the hashtag I use the most in my tweets.

I can hear some people saying right now “Alex, you didn’t grow up on Autism. You grew up with Aspergers. You shouldn’t call yourself autistic when other people have been called it all their lives.” I get the concern there. It might come across as insensitive. However, why is it insensitive? There may be reasons other than this one, but isn’t the big one: “You grew up with Aspergers, not autism. Having autism is harder than having Aspergers.”? Well, Aspergers is, you could say, the “highest functioning” form of autism. It’s on the spectrum. If I told you, “I have Autism,” that isn’t medically incorrect. It can be “misleading,” but it would be misleading because of the assumptions that come with the Autism/Aspergers stigma.

I have been bullied for most of my life. I was socially awkward, didn’t understand people, got in trouble a lot for angry outbursts and misunderstandings, was confused all the time, and so many other things. Heck, I still struggle with these things, though to a lesser degree. I get misunderstood so often, even today. I got placed in Special Ed, which I did not like as a kid. It felt alienating. I felt different! Asperger Syndrome is a real struggle.

Many people think Asperger Syndrome is also the coolest thing ever! Like it somehow makes me smarter. In my opinion, I think everyone has the potential to be smart. I think a lot of it is right time and right place. It depends on what family you’re born into, where you live, your resources, how much you are loved, your willingness to learn, etc. You might have seen shows like The Good Doctor argue that people on the spectrum can be brilliant. Yes, we are wired in a way that sometimes puts us at a more natural advantage than our neurotypical peers. It’s easier to concentrate on one specific thing, particularly when it is something we enjoy. Extensive knowledge in what we like can make us sound like experts. I will tell you, I’ve had many people get impressed by my artistic skills and knowledge. They are impressed with my stories, my characters, my artwork, my words. There are people who think I’m a genius! One person I know watches The Good Doctor and actually compared me to the main character. Now I’ve only watched the first episode (I liked it). I’ve heard people argue, including those on the spectrum, that it is a positive stereotype. When I went to college, I told a college student that I have Asperger Syndrome, and she replied bona fide, “Congratulations.” She wasn’t being sarcastic or mean or anything!

What I’m saying here is that I’ve had people saying that I’m brilliant, and other people say things that made me feel like the village idiot. I know other Aspies who’ve been perceived with both negative and positive stereotypes. I forgot where I heard it, but one Twitter user said her teacher told her she was “bright,” but not “intelligent.” I could relate, though no one ever blatantly told me that.

Side note: My first interpretation of The Good Doctor was that it just artistically shows the mind of an autistic person, not that it stereotypically shows the mind of an autistic person.

Many people might think I shouldn’t call myself “Autistic” because I’m “smarter than that.” That is based on ignorance. Autism doesn’t measure intelligence. It has a set of characteristics that at times puts one at a social, and sometimes intellectual, disadvantage. I think the core problems with Autism are more social related than intelligence related. Or you could say it’s a matter of “social intelligence,” but please don’t call it a matter of overall “intelligence.” You’ve got many autistic savants. You don’t have many autistic people that are natural at conversations. I often don’t like my autism because it causes much confusion for me. I still like it when I’m hyper-focused on what I love (sometimes). I just don’t like it when it’s so hard to interpret a social situation that everyone else seems to understand.

Autistic people who are “lower functioning” may have it harder than me, but that doesn’t make what I deal with easy. In fact, I wonder how much “lower functioning” is based on judgmental attitudes as opposed to scientific reality.

Regardless of who has it harder, we need to face truth. Jesus says “The truth will set you free.” (John 8:32) The truth here is, my medical diagnosis at 2 years old was “Asperger Syndrome.” It is 2019 now, and 6 years ago it’s been grouped in with Autism Spectrum Disorder. We now know that Aspergers is also Autism, so why act as if it’s not? We deal with the same key features, like sensory sensitivity and social confusion. The symptoms are just at all different levels.

The reason why I go by “Autistic” now is not because I’m looking for attention or pity. I do it to acknowledge that my Aspie self and all autistic individuals are on the same spectrum. We have the same diagnosis. It doesn’t matter who has it worse. Comparison is stupid. What’s that gonna do? To me, all it does is underestimate the real and difficult problems of those who are “higher functioning.” To me, comparison communicates “That person is more autistic than you are. You’re fine.” That’s not true. Every autistic person’s case is unique, Aspie or not. Dismissing problems because they are less severe doesn’t make them not problems (in this case here, we’re talking about the problems that may come with any form of autism). Imagine two leaks in a ship. One leak is bigger than the other. Would you say, “This bigger leak needs to be fixed, but we don’t have to fix the other one because it’s not as big.”? No, you fix BOTH leaks. This analogy is inspired by this quote: “Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship.” — Benjamin Franklin

Going by “Autistic” as opposed to “Aspie” is more inclusive. I have fans that are all over the spectrum. This is something I didn’t expect when I first created my channel. I don’t wanna single out a significant portion of my audience like that.

I still use the word “Aspie.” However, I don’t use it as often and I don’t use it to refer to my entire audience anymore. I think it’s a cute term of endearment. I sometimes use it interchangeably. I will say “Aspie” around people who also grew up with the Asperger diagnosis. I don’t see it as a bad word. However, I typically avoid it in my online posts. I do it so that everyone feels included, as they should. I am not superior to someone who never grew up as someone with Aspergers but did with Autism. We need to use language that indicates that we’re all in this together. Exceptions are everywhere. There are people who grew up on Aspergers; there are people who grew up on Autism. There are autistic people who are verbal; there are autistic people who are non-verbal. There are autistic people who are Caucasian; there are autistic people who are Hispanic (or some other ethnicity). I know an Autistic person that’s Caucasian AND Hispanic (Charlie and my cousin)! Regardless of what all makes us different, we won’t get anywhere without a sense of unity. Identifying as “autistic”, I think, strengthens the unity.

Now, I don’t think it’s wrong to go by “Aspie.” If you wanna say “Aspie,” go ahead! After all, I heard the word come from a delightful Aspie himself 🙂

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29